Moments Caught

Moments to Remember

Tuesday, May 06, 2014

Life Now

So much has happened in the past two years in my life. My family has faced illness, death, heartache, and other major issues. Personally, I have tried to find a way out, out of my own head, out of my childhood town, out of the box that I have built myself. Life is a series of choices, both good and bad, at times these choices feel right at other they feel wrong. I look back over my life and I see the choices and the roads that I have chosen. I left home to go to college at age 18 and I thought then that I would start a new life. I believed that I would have a fun four years of college, so different from high school, and then graduate and find my dream job and start a new family. For a brief moment in time I thought that all those pieces were going to fall into place, but that dream was shattered one moment after another. I moved back to my childhood home, found a semi-decent job and began to work. Now years later I am still in the same place, I have very little to show for my time on this planet. People always seem to want to tear down what little that I have accomplished. I feel worthless most days, unappreciated the other days. I see ways to leave, roads that I can chose, but I see other roads that I need to finish first. I realized that there are few people who care, and fewer that are unselfish in their motivations. I know that I am truly alone in this world and it is not good to be all alone. I have a handful of close people who truly care about me but I see through the others in my life that only want to use me to further some agenda that they have thought up. Somedays I want to pack a bag and get in my vehicle and just drive away, never settle down, never expecting anything else but the next road. Oh well life continues to churn ....

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