I am always amazed at what people think and say. If we put as much effort in productive ways instead of talking and worrying about different things we would all be richer.

Ever seem like what you are or what you do is not good enough? Ever have that wow moment when you realize that people just like to use and abuse you for their own means? I have had these moments for about two months now. I want to just scream and cry and get it all out but for some reason I stay quiet and just keep going. Maybe it will all get better, maybe I will change. Who knows what the future holds for me? I don't anymore.

I have a headache today. Seems that I have a headache everyday anymore. I once thought that life was a journey and that all things in time would work out and become clear. Sometimes I would watch as an observer and sometimes I would be a participate. I never thought of changing the world, I never had some great ambition. I have always wanted the simpler things in life, family, love, good health, enough security to live comfortably. I suppose as I have gotten older and saw things through the eyes of an adult I have came to realize what a selfish, hyprocitical, political, and unfair world that we all life. I just want to have a nice home, a decent car, and a family that is healthy and happy. I look around and I see this things in other peoples lives and I wonder what I ever did or what caused my life to be so hard and difficult. I have always tried to be honest and true to all those in my life. Maybe I need to change and be selfish and hard like all these other people.

I just don't know anymore...

I am tired this evening. Seems that the world is closing in on me. I have felt bad for awhile now and I can not decide what I should do. It seems that each time that I figure out one part of my life a question arises in another part. I suppose that is life. I am happy for the most part and I realize that I am lucky in alot of ways in life. It has taken me sometime to realize all this but I am content. I just wish that I would feel better.

I have noticed something about people in general. It seems that people have no concept of a world without the internet. They look up phone numbers to local places, play games that are silly when in reality they could never complete those same tasks in reality. I may be getting older and more old fashioned or maybe I see the end of civilization as we know it coming, but people learn real life skills. Technology is important and it does make life easier but I also like the idea that I can grow a garden or read a book. Look beyond the easy and learn these tasks or the human race is doomed. That is my rant for today.

There is a time I suppose in everyone's life that we stop and breathe for a moment. I have taken the past year to breathe. To let old sorrows and disappointments go and to look foward to a life that is full and happy. I realize that age is only a number and that life is about the memories and choices that we make in that moment. I have always lived with no regrets and I still choose to. The world is a odd and cold place without family, friendship, and love we are standing against the wall. I hope that in the next year I reconnect and rejoin a world that I miss, a world of friendship, respect, and peace. Peace is so vital to me now. Peaceful rest, peaceful days, just plain simple peace.

These are some of the pictures I took on a recent trip to Nashville, Tenn. It was a nice, quick trip to relieve some of the stress of everyday. We went to the PBR Event, Country Music Hall of Fame, Nashville Zoo at Grassmere, and The Hermitage. I would love to go back and take more time to walk around and experience Nashville in more detail.